Meditation [Open to Anya/Toshi]

The Bitch Wolf · Big Bad Bitch

Meditation [Open to Anya/Toshi]

Archeology Queen · Eat your heart out Indiana Jones

-The door opened and stirred the air and left Loke there staring up into Anya's orange and violet eyes that looked like the petals of a stargazer. Blonde hair fell around Anya's face in smooth baby fine waves and she looked beyond Loke to see if anyone else was there before her soft voice issued an invitation for Loke to come inside. Stepping back she opened the door so the other woman could come inside.-

"This is early for you Loke. What did you see?"

-Anya's seemed deceptively vivid and awake for someone pulled from her meditation by such an early morning alarm. Serenity poured from her in waves as she closed the door and moved into the center of the room with Loke. Already the room smelled like Anya, like the incense she burned and the trinkets she left on the altar near her bed. In short it smelled just like walking inside the main temple in Tibet, like a place where time didn't move the same way.-

-Her fingers reached up and tucked the loose chunks of blonde hair back behind her ears to keep it out of her face. Moving with a simple grace she took a seat on one of the large cushions she had laid out on the ground and pulled her long legs in to sit in full lotus position facing Loke. As her eyes watched the other woman she could see the strain in her face, it had been awhile since she'd seen such worry in her.-

"Begin."

-And so Anya would listen and as she listened she would pray for the great spirit of the universe to open her mind and hear what she needed to hear in Loke's words.-

The Bitch Wolf · Big Bad Bitch

The relief that flooded her face when Anya openned the door was evident. While the therapist she had seen in Hawaii had done wonders this was so much better. A support system that understood what she had seen, what she was, what she had gone through. Anya had sat through the story of her life and probably knew Loke better then most any one else, save perhaps her Attorney back in Boston.

She stepped inside Puppy at her heels. He lopped over beside Anya's cushion seat and sprawled out on his stomach spread wide on the floor, his little twitchy tail quivering. Loke took a seat sitting indian style since her body didn't want to bend so nicely into a lotus postion.

"I have still been having nightmares, but usually now I realize that it's a nightmare and can shut it off. But ... " Hands rubbed against her knees, rubbing away the hint of persperation on them. "The one I had tonight, I couldn't get out of it. It's the same as last time. Being alone, pushed aside. My therapist that I went too in Hawaii before had said my nightmares of being alone stem from my mother rejecting me when I was attacked. " She took a breath and closed her eyes trying to concentrate. "I dreamt that Evie, she wanted nothing to do with me. That she turned from me, left me alone." Those amber wolf eyes slid open as she let out the breath slowly.

"I know that's silly because I have this pack and my pack mates, but I cannot shake this irrational fear of being alone. Not again. Will you help me try and get over this, Sifu?"

Archeology Queen · Eat your heart out Indiana Jones

-Anya listened to Loke's words, and as the woman spoke she reached out towards her. The tips of Anya's fingers touched Loke's. Slipping her hands into the other womans she let the energy of their beasts mingle as they spoke. On that other level she could feel the irritation of Loke's black bitch, hear the plaintive howls of the wolf as it mourned. Anya's own white wolf pressed close, furred pelt brushing against the other wolf as they communicated in a way that had nothing to do with speech. Only when Loke finished did she let her eyes open again to look the beautiful dark lycan in the eyes.-

"Did it pass your notice Loke, that while you dream these people into not wanting you, it is you who is avoiding them?"

-She let her fingers lightly rub against the soft crepe paper thin flesh of Loke's wrists as she felt the rush of blood beneath the surface. Her beast reacted to that blood, to the smell of pack and lifted it's head to howl beautifully.-

"Maybe it's not being alone you are really afraid of Loke-san. Maybe it is letting yourself truly belong to others."

-Finally her hands slid from Loke's grasp and she felt the heat of the other womans touch leave marks against her skin. Those hands went to rest against her knees as she sat relaxed in that lotus pose as if she could have stayed just like that all day long.-

"All your running Loke. All the chasing. All the searching for a place to belong. Do you end up alone because people don't want you? Or because you are afraid of how much they do want you?"

-- Edited by Archeology Queen on Tuesday 28th of April 2009 11:12:12 PM

The Bitch Wolf · Big Bad Bitch

Lips turned down in a slight frown. It wasn't in anger or distrust but rather she frowned at herself. Anya's words where completely true and it shocked her to hear them. She frowned deeper as she dropped her eyes from Anya's and let her hands go limp. Puppy who had settled beside Anya's cushion perked an ear and tilted his head.

She was silent for a very long while, simply thinking over her words. She sat in silence, it wasn't ackward or strained just a thoughtful silence.

"Your right." Loke looked up at Anya and she shook her head slightly. "I guess it's time for me stop running." She gave a faint smile and the tension in her shoulders started to relax and the turmoil disappear. "Do you mind if I meditate with you today?"